Me and Them; A(n Almost) Lesbian Love Story

Note: I realize that some of my readers, especially my aunt-in-law Alison and her colleague(s), as well as several other friends who read my blog every time I post something new, would be surprised to read the title and wonder what this is all about. But please continue, you would find out the reason behind it. Or not.

Inspired by Rima and Therry‘s posts about how some people just click and become so close after only several months, as well as being insanely jealous because they don’t include me in their (lesbian) combo, and seeing that their posts drove more traffic to their blogs respectively (hence, more jealousy), I decide that rather than begging (waiting for) them to love me, in the spirit of virtual competition, I have to brag that I actually have that sort of relationship they’re having now.

Those who read my blog regularly might know that Ecky isn’t just my blogbuddy. She is my buddy. Well, more than a buddy, actually. She is one of my best friends in real life. Flesh and blood and all. Considering that we met only a couple of years ago, we have been developing a very strong bond between us. Even back then I sometimes wondered how we could fit so perfectly and understand each other so much sometimes we’re so alike it’s scary. She is one of my (real) friends who blog, and last year we were trying to learn HTML language, we spent a lot of time in front of computers (me in Aberdeen and her in Jakarta) and discussed how to put widgets, or how to change the header, or what is technorati. Both of us have had zero knowledge of HTML language so we were learning by doing. When I was back for holiday, we and other friends met up for a coffee and before we realized we talked about blog and bloggers, and I was helping her to fix her expandable post mode, up until our other friends started to feel annoyed because they were left out of the conversation and couldn’t understand a single word we were talking. My passion of writing (or to some, it’s more ranting but what the heck, others love my rants!) was infectious, and Ecky (as well as another best friend Melly) started to write more regularly on her blog.

We are really close we practically tell each other everything, sometimes we forget that we are busy texting each other and neglecting our partners. Even after I move to Aberdeen and 6 hours and 12,000km apart, nothing has changed. Many occasions Ecky was sitting in front of telly, sending me texts about the show she was watching, and then we were texting each other for hours she completely forgot that poor Sam was siting next to her, and I forgot that Stuart was there. Or Stuart and I were driving out of town for a romantic weekend gateway, and I was busy sending texts to her rather than talking to him.

Our bond is so strong we even want the same thing at the same time. There was one time she was in Bali, walking around a bookshop, thinking about buying this particular chick lit but decided to wait until she got back to Jakarta. Later that afternoon she checked on her Facebook and found out I just posted that same book she wanted to read as my new reading list. We also know how to not push each other button (I hate when people are being late and Ecky is pretty much always on time), although of course, just like in every relationship, sometimes we argue. But her easy going character compliments me who is more than once a pain in the butt, being everything-always-have-to-be-perfect-and-according-to-schedule. And since we are being honest to each other, although it hurts, it solves the problem much quicker.

To me, I know someone is a good friend when s/he is willing to be with you when you’re in trouble and need a help. I have lots of friends but I know for a fact that there is only a few of them want to share my pain and sorrow, and vice versa. Just throw a BBQ party by the pool and 50 people will turn up. Say that you’re sad and only several are willing to listen to you. Say that you need someone to help you to find a place to stay for your in-laws in Jakarta, and only a few will make an effort to search and look for the information you need. Announce that you are offered a good job which you can’t take because it’s in London or Dubai, and a good friend will show a genuine interest and ask if there are other possibilities to work it out, while others will ask if I could pass that job to them instead.

Ecky is definitely my good friend, so good that she postponed her trip to Australia for a few days just to spend the weekend with me (of course, Sam was ignored, again. But what could he do?). So good that on that particular Friday night to celebrate Nonie’s birthday, Ecky (and Lindsay, second girl from the left, in the picture) had to carry me home and put me to bed (please don’t ask whether we shared the bed or not).

Back to Therry and Rima combo. I have met Therry in person and was (secretly) glad that she is a sweet, pretty, smart, normal girl, not some weird nerd with inflated ego who’s thinking she’s smarter than everybody else and invents jargons that no one understands just to show how important she is. At the beginning I was wondering how on earth we should start the conversation, but after she patiently waited for me greeting everybody in Cazbar in a manner of a celebrity has arrived (you see that I’m an attention seeker in real life as well as traffic seeker in blogosphere), and spent minutes reading the menu, we started to chat and before we knew it, we had spent 2 hours talking non-stop. It was an instant bonding, something that can’t be made up. I haven’t met Rima in person but she is so ‘what you see what you get’, I feel like I already know her, and of course, a meet-up is in the next agenda.

Those three girls are real. They have accomplished many things in life, they have overcome so many problems. But they are very humble without loosing their ability to speak up, they can be opinionated without loosing temper, manner, and ethics. They are mature and secure with themselves so they receive critics, arguments, and differences as part of their writing processes. If their blogs are very busy with comments and visitors at the moment, it’s because people can see all of those quality they posses, as well as the quality of their posts respectively.

I‘m learning many things from this wonderful girls. I’m sure you would too.

Oh, and the lesbian thingy? It’s just a trick to increase the traffic….

Read Ecky’s post with the same title here.
Read Therrys post about our meet-up here.

PS: the trick works! I checked my stat counter the next day and my visitors were up to 55% after I published the article. I should’ve done this a long time a go before Rima and Therry become (more) famous. LOL!!



  1. Andie Summerkiss says:

    That is such a touching post, Anita.

    Isn’t that great to have same-sex friends? Not that different-sex friends are a downer, but there are certain topics best to be discussed with girls alone.

    Let’s not go that deep, shall we?

  2. Finally Woken says:

    @Andie: indeed. Life is beautiful if we have many friends, regardless whether they’re real or virtual :).

  3. rimafauzi says:

    Ok, It’s OFFICIAL

    I LOVE YOU TOO! (and Andie.. lol)

    It is so good to read about what you have with ecky and melly, and also how we can become real life friends (hopefully for a long time) ..

    There are parts that made me ROTFLLCACLAMW (rolling on the floor laughing like crazy and crying like a mad woman) but i assume you already knew that lol

  4. Hey Nit, you shouldn’t be jealous because you’ve already met me when Rima hasn’t! LOL

    You know that whole lesbian hoo-ha is just a cheap trick to increase traffic, and whaddya know, it works! We’re such attention whores – well, Rima is. I’m just trying to get her to rub on some of her general fabulousness to me lol.

    Too bad I couldn’ spend more time with you at Cazbar – already familiar with how the traffic would be during peak hours, I had to leave (hesitantly). You noticed I already said I was leaving like 3 times and I ended up leaving half an hour later ha3x..

    Can’t wait to catch up with you again! :)

  5. woelank says:

    I prefer called the three of you “ibu-ibu arisan”.. hahahahaha….
    Btw Nit, I’ve tag you..

  6. accordingtod says:

    geez louis anita! such an attention seeker, lol. you don’t need to seek it, my dear… it’ll come to you, trust me!

    another sweet posting about same sex friendship…

  7. Devastating. I’m growing sadder and sadder all the time. All those beautiful female friendships will cause shortages in the heterosexual dating market.

    Ladies, please beware.


  8. aaaw…it’s sweet to have great friends in life isn’t it? Totally agree…friends keep life more alive and real friends don’t always guarantee that they are true to us. Some virtual friends are just as true. It’s beautiful to see the friendship Rima, Therry and you have. Don’t let anything get in the way πŸ˜‰

  9. Dilligaf says:

    Hmmm, for sure I cannot see myself declaring undying love with Tree….

    But, yes, sex does sell, Mak Erots death this week added another 3,000hits onto the blog due to an old posting, titles like “Gay Plauge hits Jakarta” and “Bonking in Bandung” also got the hits up!

    I’ll have to see what I can do with “Lesbian” and see what happens!

    Your reporter from Sichuan Province – China, signing off!

  10. Finally Woken says:

    @Rima: uhm… which part? (**with innocent face**).

    @Therry: I don’t need the traffic! Wait, yes I do, but only from people who can take my posts seriously. Wait, wait, I don’t need it (jumping up and down). On second thought, I do. LOL.

    @Colson: don’t worry, you’re still my (our) favorite male blogger.

    @Ivy: yes life loves me baby… and I’m fortunate to have such great friends, in reality and virtually.

    @Dilligaf: I know male bonding can be so deep too, I’ve seen it because sometimes I have to compete with my dear hubbie’s boyfriends to get his attention. The thing is, just like you say, you never consider to declare it to the entire world :).

    Have you tried beef in water? Marvelous!

  11. rimafauzi says:

    @therry: Yes you are right, I am a whore, um, attention whore. lol

    @colson: dont worry, us lesbians are still capable to ‘satisfy’ the hetereosexual world πŸ˜‰

    @dilligaf: dil, you should you know, declare your love to tree, or stump, or whoever is male.. I’d read the post, really!! (gay erotica is so hot lol)

    @anita: dont play innocent with me young lady!! lol

    I need traffic too, but fortunately for me, I dont limit visits from whatever, married, single, swingers, gay, kaskuser, bigots, snobs, aristocrat, tranny, stumps, trees, bears, dilligafs, satan, god, whatever is fine with me! πŸ˜‰

  12. Rob Baiton says:


    Friends are important! They tend to keep us balanced and tell us things that we probably would not accept hearing from anyone else.

    I am going to have to post more stuff with interesting titles that are completely unrelated to the subject matter in an attempt to drive traffic.


    I am going to have to write something about Mak Erot because I do not get 3000 hits in a month let alone a couple of days to a week. Thanks for the idea πŸ˜€

  13. woelank says:

    it seems that my last comment went right in to spam corner..
    I’ve tag you nit, you might see the link at rima or therry’s site


  14. Anita, some friendships have the taste of a wonderful wine, a good chocolate cake and a great coffee. I think you and Ecky share a secret ingredients to keep your friendship lasts this long. Thank you for sharing Ecky with us…hehehe!

  15. Finally Woken says:

    Elyani, I love your idioms :). We do all of them literally hehehe.

  16. Marc Neilson says:

    You are right Anita, the lesbian title got me to read the whole blog haha. I’ll try it on mine! Maybe with lesbian cats!

  17. Finally Woken says:

    @Marc: gotcha! lol. But lesbian cats? That’s a first! Let me know if you post it!

  18. It works it works… The lesbian title generate traffic!

    Nit, maybe if we share our “intimate” photos will “scare” all male (hetero) bloggers LOL

    @ Rima: Tell me tell me which part? πŸ˜‰

  19. Finally Woken says:

    Another stupidity of not checking comments caught by spam police, sorry for releasing them late.

    Here’s my response:

    @Woelank: and that makes you… what? Oh hold on, I know, I know! You’re our… bodyguard?

    @Accordingtod: I know, I’m that pathetic. But it works! I’m thinking about posting an entry about Mak Erot, just like Dilligaf and RB.

    @Rima: do you have IP address of Satan and God? Do they sometime use other aliases?

    @Ecky: yeah we’re that desperate looking for traffic lol!

  20. I love this post.

    Reading about your friendship in this virtual world and become your real friendship, in the real world is so inspiring.

    hope your friendship will be last forever.

    ihhh, jeles dehhh, sumpahhh, hehehehe :)

  21. anita, hope you don’t mind me linking your blog like i did with Rima’s and Elyani’s ^^

  22. kookimebux says:

    Hello. And Bye. :)


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